Monday, December 31, 2012

Happy New Year!

Well dear readers, 2012 is coming to a close.  It has been a pleasure exploring and evaluating life with you, labeling and classifying all of the precious rare birds that exist in our society.  This year we've learned all kinds of things, like the importance of checking in with all our little closet psychos.  We received advice on selecting good mates to procreate with.  We’ve discovered the reason why some men just don’t stand a chance and never will with some women.  We’ve covered proper etiquette in a civilized society, and the need to keep your fucking disgusting germs to yourself.  We came to the tragic realization that most sexual experiences last about 7 measly minutes.  We figured out where the boys have been hiding.  We discussed alternative forms of child discipline and different motivational techniques we can use for said children.  We learned that one’s choices and others’ sympathy levels go hand-in-hand.  We learned that we are all prostitutes for some corporation, and will continue to be until we pursue our dreams.  We understand the importance of confidence, and how one’s strut can change one’s life.  We learned that everyone walking around here is not quite human, no matter how life-like.  Finally, we now know that Lucas McKenzie will never consume your hacked-in chili.

That said, I thank all of my readers for being so loyal throughout the year!  I’m sure 2013 will be a hot mess, so please check back in for the usual break-down!  Have a safe, happy, healthy New Year!  You rare little strange ass damn birds.    

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