There's Always A Bitch

This is probably bad timing, but I'm going to write about it anyway.

First, I'd like to apologize to my readers for the absence.  I told you already my job is trying to kill me, I think you think I'm joking.  I see alot of you have been visiting, and I thank you for checking in!

So I'm watching the news here and this man is on trial for attempting to murder his attorney wife.  The reason?  He was living a double life and needed to rid himself of his wife so he could pursue his new life with this bitch.

So, why do I say there's always a bitch?  Because there always is! Watch any episode of Snapped where the man tries or succeeds in killing the woman.  99% of the time it's because he's having an affair and needs to be freed of the ol' ball and chain.  99% of the time.   All I've got to say about that, is that mistress must have some goooooooooood pu$$y!  Any woman who can make a man kill is working with something and should be hosting classes at the local university.  

But aside from that, why do people think they can actually get away with this?  It like....doesn't fit into 2012. We have iPads now for god's sake, why are we still killing people?  Haven't we come a litter  further?  I believe it's a combination of a strong lack of checking in, poor breeding, and people who are just plain crazy.  We gotta pray yall.

Why Men Settle Down

I've answered long-standing questions for you all before, and I'm getting ready to answer another one for you!  Many people wonder what causes a man to finally settle down.  Is it age?  Career success?  The "right" woman?  Fate?

Sorry to disappoint, but none of those are the reasons.  The reason a man finally settles down is because he eventually comes to the realization that he cannot reasonably run-it to every fine woman that he sees.

You see, when men are young, they are of the false belief that fine women are in short supply.  For this reason, he tries to sample as many of them as he can, because this might be the last fine one that ever crosses his path.

But then, a funny thing happens around the 2nd quarter of a man's life when he finds himself surrounded by a slew of gorgeous women and he has the epiphany, "I cannot reasonably offer penis to each and every single one of these women."  It is then that he chooses a suitable mate and settles down.

Now don't get it twisted, he'll look forever, but eventually that back will be too tired to throw in all kinds of different directions, and he'll come right on home and fall asleep on the couch.

Gettin' Ugly

As much as I talk about creatures that happen to be tall and fine, today I decided that I am going to seek out and marry an ugly man.

The reason is because I simply could not trust a fine man to walk around unattended, day in and day out.  Fine is fine, and you're fooling yourself if you think that nobody else sees that.  They see it.  And they want it.

Some women are ruthless and shameless in their pursuit of men, married or otherwise.  Why should I have to contend with that?  True enough, it's his responsibility to maintain the faithfulness of his dick, but c'mon...Some women might as well be sirens.

With that said, I'm going to look for a man that is remarkably unattractive to date and marry.  Perhaps our looks will balance out and produce a fairly decent looking kid.  Most important though, is that 9 out of 10 women would reject him.  Kirstie Alley recently announced the same thing, and I think she might be on to something!