Thursday, January 3, 2013

My 70 Year Old Boyfriend

By now, you all should know my love of and passion for planning ahead.  I will agree to almost anything, as long as I have 48-72 hours notice.  Same-day requests are basically guaranteed to get vetoed.

With this, I have already mapped out my elderly years.  I'm not sure if I'll be single or widowed by age 93, but I'm telling you this right now:  I'm gonna have me a 70 year old boyfriend.  Oh yes ma'am.  That fool is gonna be upright, agile, and might still be able to drive.  Hell, he might even still be working! Honey, I'm gonna be the talk of the nursing community.  They are ALL going to be jealous, and hate on my relationship with my young boyfriend who still has all of his teeth.

This is why it is so important to work hard to maintain your looks, ladies.  If that fool clocks out early and leaves you in your 80s or 90s all alone, what are you going to do?  Mope around for the remainder of your years?  No ma'am! Go out, get you a solid 76 year old and keep it movin.

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