Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Wrap-Around Curtains

I'm watching HGTV this evening, and a show comes on featuring this young couple touring a prospective homes.   When they get to the master bathroom, the wife notices that there is a shower curtain rod in place instead of a door or walk-in shower situation.  Snarkily, the woman says to the realtor, “Oh this will never work.  I hate shower curtains.  I always get all tangled up in them while I’m taking a shower.”

Bitch, what the hell are you doing in the shower that’s causing you to get tangled in the curtains?  Are you leaning on them with all your weight?  Are you twirling?  I've taken many a shower in my day, and never once have I gotten tangled in the curtains.  I could understand if she had said they seem gross or get moldy quickly, or even that she just likes the look of shower doors, but getting tangled?  What kind of fucking klutz are you?

And since we’re on the subject of HGTV, I've got a real gripe with most of their shows.  While I enjoy their programming on the whole, I’m really getting sick and tired of these spoiled, bratty, obnoxious, entitled homeowners.  “Ugh, I hate the way that window lines up with this door.”  Bitch, some people don’t have windows or doors anymore, because they washed into the Atlantic Ocean when Hurricane Sandy came through.  Or “Ugh, we had to spend another $20,000 on kitchen renovations because our contractor made a mistake.”  Slut, please be excited that you even have additional monies to spend on something as unnecessary as a new backsplash.  Some people in our society can barely make rent.  Stop complaining.  And stop getting tangled in the damn curtains!

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