Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Who's Gonna Feed That?

Aside from men who happen to be tall and fine, I used to have a thing for "big" men.  Big in the muscular/athletic sense, and the bigger, the better.  My favorite weight was anywhere between 225 and 250.

Well, after dating a few big guys you begin to realize that it's not all it's cracked up to be.  Big men generate a lot of heat.  Big men tend to bump into things and break stuff on accident. Big men take up a lot of space in the bed.  Big men are heavy.  Big men have big clothes which equals big laundry.  And last but not least, big men have even bigger appetites.  Son, who in the hell is gonna feed you?

Can you imagine what your average grocery bill would look like?  And you expect me to produce three or more meals for you, every day? You're out of your mind.  You've got to be doing some real impressing for me to run a small cafeteria out of my house.

P.S. I ran into Mr. Tall and Fine the other day, and I am happy to report, he hasn't gotten any shorter!

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